Future Choices

It seems casually arrogant to choose a specialty before even starting medical school. Other than books, television, movies and the occasional shadowing experience, I don’t really know what specialties of medicine are like. There are subspecialties, I’m sure, that I’m not even aware of. By the time I graduate in four years’ time, there might even be new emerging areas of medicine to get into. I don’t really need to choose for 3 and a half years (though knowing earlier could help structure my fourth year electives). If this whole thing is a game then, I don’t even know the rules.

I do, however, know myself. I have some useful abilities. I’m a quick thinker. I’m good under pressure. I’m good with my hands. I can follow instructions. I’m extremely competitive. I’m willing to work hard. I’m willing to work long hours. I also have weaknesses; I’m not patient. I have a short attention span. I have an average memory. I’m sometimes hot headed. I need to feel important.

All things being equal, the money isn’t that important to me. I don’t need to be rich (at least not while I’m young). I don’t spend a lot on myself, but I would like to start a small family at the right time. I would be more than comfortable driving a cheap car, living in a reasonably sized house, and spending the rest of the money on the people I really care about. I’m not sure what’s wrong with me, what part of the American capitalist spirit I missed out on, but I don’t see the point of buying nice things for myself. I’m sure it’s something to do with my childhood or self-esteem or something but I’d rather not tease that out right now.

So with the compensation out of the picture, I’m left with what might fit my personality best. I want to be challenged with something new every day, but most specialties will give me that. I’ve always been interested in solving puzzles, so I think I would very much like diagnosis.

One thing that really makes me interested in Surgery is the idea of immediacy. It isn’t universal, but most cases I would be involved in would fit this model. First you identify the problem. Then you actually manually fix it. I like this part because it involves some skill, a great deal of pressure, and a sense of importance. Then, as harsh as it might seem, the problem is either fixed or it isn’t.

Becoming a doctor for me has always been about helping others. As much as I think surgery is the best option for me right now, I’m not sure that over the next few years it won’t change. I’m willing to wait and see; sometimes the best part of the journey is when the destination is just out of sight over the next hill.